I love Biology. I like looking at life all around me, watching it, wondering all sorts of things about this being I am watching. Constantly; trees, insects, animals, humans. Not just asking things like, “How is the water being consumed by this creature being distributed in the body?”, but things like, “Are these biological reactions that cause me to feel sad also happening in any other animals?”, “Are there other hormonal and chemical reactions going on that make them feel things that I have never felt before?” You would think so since ingesting drugs makes humans feel things they usually don’t naturally.
Of course there are answers to these questions. But we do not know every single thing about every molecule, protein, hormone, and further back gene, epigenetics, and all sorts of other factors that go in to life and why things happen the way they happen. Every gene being expressed, every protein interacting, every cell that interacts, every signal transduction cascade… We have not even discovered all of the species of the world yet and probably never will (Just trying to make a point Phylo people!! You can do it!) . I want to learn as much as possible. What do we know? What can we find out from testing things? What can we discover?
My passion lies in wondering about the most ridiculous things and having fantastical ideas. What’s even more satisfying is knowing that other people are thinking of similar things and actually doing them in science. I am BRCA 1 positive, which means that I have a high chance of getting really aggressive cancer at any time. It also means that I have lost a lot of the best people in my family to cancer. I have thought about cancer and wanting to be rid of it. I had a journal where I wrote ideas about how to control cancer cell growth and proliferation. WHy not make the cancer cells glow and take those suckers out ASAP? How about the magnetisomes that microorganisms have to orient themselves North or South? Maybe being able to differentiate and target cancer cells in the body, inserting a magnetisome and then having small portal at different points in the body have a magnet to pull the cells there and take them out would work? Well of course now I see all of the problems that come along with these ideas, but I was younger and I think this shows that I care about solutions.
Although I would LOVE to cure cancer, I know that my passion lies in the little things in biology that turn out to be big things. Things aren’t usually discovered directly, but indirectly because of a science “accident”. I really do love animals and nature, and I am fascinated with cell biology. Where do I go from here? I spend my time in my molecular biology lab, and then some times I go and volunteer at the aquarium to quench my thirst for observing nature. I love school and solving puzzles and riddles. Seems like I would be perfect for biology research.
I am not good enough right now. My GPA in college sucked. This is when I was losing all of my family members and on top of that my step dad was treating me inappropriately for years. I had a lot of shit going on. But I still struggled with dealing with life and I made it through. I fought through that and I have a much better appreciation for life and how important your life’s passion and work is. I don’t want to waste a second of my life on petty things, even though it will happen sometimes because I am human.
I am trying to build myself up on paper, and build my legs up even more for rockiness ahead. I am working in a lab and am so grateful that I am getting to do this. This means I can still work towards my passion in life. I can prove to myself that I can do this. I don’t know how I will get there, but someday I will be able to wake up every morning and be able to work on/with/observe biology, life in a way that will help solve some minuscule or immense problem in the world.
Science ❤
lovesbio 